What you Should and Shouldn't Do

• Retain and then follow your lawyer's advice.
• Tell your lawyer everything and not just things that you think are important.
• Be pragmatic. Don't spend thousands of dollars fighting over something worth hundreds of dollars.
• Everyone underestimates the financial and emotional expense of negotiations and litigation. Think long term and weigh the ultimate cost, financial and otherwise, of your actions.
• When considering your children put aside past arguments between you and your former partner.
• When planning to separate take photocopies of bank account statements, superannuation details, business tax returns, balance sheets and other documents relating to your financial position (both you & your husband).
• Take with you all your official papers such as birth and marriage certificates, passports and tax returns. Also take with your personal items, clothing, jewellery and those items that cannot be replaced such as family photographs and heirlooms.
• Consult your lawyer about closing joint financial accounts as either you or your former partner can close and empty joint financial accounts or credit cards without one another's consent. You may even be able to draw down on lines of credit or mortgages secured against real estate. Talk to you lawyer to consider what steps you can take or what you should do about joint financial accounts.
• Consider changing your Will if your former partner is a beneficiary.
• Apply for a divorce. If you die before you are divorced your spouse can make a claim against your estate.
• Keep a diary. But be careful with what you write as it may be read by the Judge and your former partner.
• Pay your Child Support, in full and on time. Failure to contribute to your children's support will not impress a judge particularly if you are asking the court to order that your children live with you or spend more time with you.

• Resist the temptation to air your dirty laundry. It will very rarely be relevant and is likely to leave a bad impression with the judge.
• Don't expect the court to compensate you for what has occurred during your relationship. The court has to make a decision on how to divide property and how children will divide their time between their parents. The court cannot and will not redress past wrongs.
• Don't underestimate the guilt factor.
• Do not move out of your home without consulting your lawyer as this may have significant adverse consequences for you.
• Do not agree to a property settlement where your partner is responsible for the ongoing payments on the home or car you are retaining
• Never show your children court documents or discuss legal matters with them.
• Don't use your children as your therapist and don't question your children regarding the activities of your former partner or use them to pass messages between you.
• Don't put your former partner down in front of the children. Your inability to behave respectfully towards the other significant person in their life will be a cross against you when deciding how much time your children spend in your care.